", "Close by is Wycombe Air Park. Usually this is "the lovely Samantha", who sits on Humph's left hand. He claimed the secret was just to read what was in front of him without understanding why it was funny. ", "Accompaniment will be provided by Colin Sell at the piano. ", "Actually, Colin was telling us before the show that he once toured Britain with The Monkees then Mr. Chipperfield promoted him to the elephants and gave him a bigger shovel. Iniciar sesin Su cuenta Carrito Ayuda. But she thought it would be impolite not to taste it anyway. Stuart Laws and the gig that never was Chortle Student Awards Semi-Final 2Bloomsbury TheatreTuesday 9 May from 19:45Book now, Gig of the day Kane Brown: Don't Listen To Me, I Chat Sh*tTop Secret Comedy Club from 18:00, Book Now Russell Howard LiveNottingham Royal Concert Hall and Theatre Royal Saturday 6th May from 20:00Book now, Coming Soon Tim Vine: Breeeep!Oxford PlayhouseWednesday 3rd May from 19:30, Book Now Alasdair Beckett-King: The Interdimensional ABKGlasgow StandThursday 18th May from 20:30Book now, Book Now Tom Allen: CompletelyCheltenham Town HallSunday 21st May from 20:00Book now. It's people like you that ruin it for the rest of us! Very well, let's move on.". For example: "And so, as the hunter of time blasts the moose of eternity, and the dairy counter worker of fate sighs and grabs her mop" Lyttelton's final sign-off on the show, shortly before his death in April 2008, was: And so as the loose-bowelled pigeon of time swoops low over the unsuspecting tourist of destiny, and the flatulent skunk of fate wanders into the air-conditioning system of eternity, I notice it's the end of the show. I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue Quotes The 70th series of the multi-award-winning comedy panel game chaired by Jack Dee. He's performed the latter quite often over the years in UK evenings with Barry Cryer. Samantha goes and I go too. This is absurdly chauvinistic. "Dear Mr. Gadaffi, You must be very proud. Oh no, hang on, that's Facebook. She appears in name only and her gentle but often slightly risqu exploits are relayed each week for the listener. I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue, Volume 12 | Audiobook Sample A ninth tour was announced in October 2019 to take place in early 2020. ", "You know, I was interested to learn recently that Colin doesn't just play the piano, in fact I have a letter here that says he's recently become very handy on the sax and that's signed by the Haringey Council Waste Disposal Department. I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue - Wikiquote This grew out of the "drama" section of later shows in the I'm Sorry, I'll Read That Again series, for example, at the Criminals' Ball, "Mr and Mrs Knee, and their Swedish son, Lars Knee". It was a relatively weak joke about sexual promiscuity. ", "As the frisky tomcat of fate confronts the scalpel of destiny, and the precious natural woodland of time meets the motorway extension of eternity", "As the Ford Anglia of time fails the MOT test of eternity, and the dappled donkey of fate ambles toward the abbetoir of destiny", "Well as the delicate mayfly of time collides with the speeding windscreen of fate, and the angry wasp of destiny flies up the trouser leg of despair", "As the loose boweled pigeon to time swoops low over the tourist of destiny, and the unlicensed mini-cab of fate gets lost in the one-way system of eternity", "As the short-sighted rhino of time attempts to mount the VW beetle of eternity, and the rubber glove of hope gets lost in the Aberdeen Angus of destiny", "As the great tit of time nibbles through the gold top of eternity, and the unseen mouse droppings of fate nestle in the Crunchy Fruit and Nut muesli of destiny", "As the rogue purple underpants of time begin their assault on the whites-only wash cycle of destiny, and the twin buttocks of fate are sucked into the malfunctioning chemical toilet of eternity", "As the armpit hair of time is snagged in the ball deodorant of destiny, and the Harpic of eternity spills unseen onto the loo roll of fate", "As the red red robin of time goes bob-bob-bobbing under the snow plough of destiny, and the sage and onion stuffing mixture of fate is rammed up the eternally unfrozen turkey of damnation", "As the grubby raincoat of time opens to reveal the upright Member of Parliament, and the categorical denial of destiny is swiftly followed by the resignation letter of fate", "As the wee-willy-winky of time pops out of the nightgown of eternity", "As the chill wind of time blows up the kilt of destiny, and the short-sighted octopus of fate attempts to mount the bagpipes of eternity", "As the little Jack Horner of time pulls out his plums of fate, and the little Tommy Tucker of destiny looks for a rhyme we can broadcast", "As the plastic cup of time fails to emerge from the vending machine of destiny, and the scalding coffee substitute of fate splashes onto the unsuspecting crotch of eternity", "As the false teeth of time come away in the Granny Smith of destiny, and the Grandpa Smith of fate decides he needs stronger dentifix", "As the 4x4 of destiny on the level crossing of fate, stalls in the path of the speeding freight train of doom, and the signalman of time rushes to fetch his camera", "As the hunter of time blasts the moose of destiny, and as the dairy counter worker of fate grabs the mop of destiny", "Lionel Blair & Christopher Biggins recently appeared on Stars in Their Eyes, where Lionel singing Maggie May came second to his old teammate. ", Barry Cryer: "You've been turning this back, you little clock-teaser! Samantha is in charge of polishing, while he scrapes the varnish and wax off next to her. Apparently, he's a vacuum cleaner salesman, and he's managed to get her the latest model. Saturday 7 January 2017 The Sands Centre. and continues by providing a little background material, usually derogatory, about the show's location: "Hastings joined with Romney, Hythe, Dover and Sandwich to form a brotherhood of coastal towns in 1067, intended to defend England from any cross-Channel invasion; they took the crest of a running horse rampant and stable door bolted. Saturday 4 February 2017 Winter Gardens, Sunday 5 January 2020 Nottingham Royal Concert Hall (Rory Bremner as guest panellist), Tuesday 7 January 2020 Bristol Hippodrome (Bremner as guest panellist), Sunday 12 January 2020 New Wimbledon Theatre (Richard Osman as guest panellist), Tuesday 14 January 2020 Sheffield City Hall (Bremner as guest panellist), Friday 17 January 2020 Festival Theatre, Edinburgh (Osman as guest panellist), Saturday 18 January 2020 Sunderland Empire (Osman as guest panellist), Monday 20 January 2020 Wolverhampton Grand Theatre (Marcus Brigstocke and John Finnemore as guest panellists), Monday 27 January 2020 St. George's Hall, Bradford (Osman as guest panellist), Friday 31 January 2020 Watford Colosseum (Osman as guest panellist and Cryer makes an appearance), Saturday 1 February 2020 Ipswich Regent (Osman as guest panellist), Thursday 17 February 2022 Stockton Globe, Thursday 24 February 2022 Charter Hall, Colchester, Tuesday 8 March 2022 Exeter Northcott Theatre, Wednesday 7 December 2022 Assembly Hall, Worthing, Tuesday 21 February 2023 The Forum, Bath (Bremner, Brigstocke, Evans and Hawks), Wednesday 22 February 2023 De Montfort Hall, Leicester (Bremner, Brigstocke, Evans and Hawks), Monday 27 February 2023 New Theatre, Oxford (Bremner, Evans, Hawks and, Tuesday 28 February 2023 The Anvil, Basingstoke (Bremner, Brigstocke, Evans and Hawks), Wednesday 1 March 2023 New Victoria Theatre, Woking (Bremner, Brigstocke, Evans and Hawks), Thursday 2 March 2023 Butterworth Hall, Warwick (Evans, Hawks, Hill and, Friday 3 March 2023 Royal Concert Hall, Nottingham (Brigstocke, Evans, Hawks and Jones), Monday 6 March 2023 York Barbican (Brigstocke, Evans, Hawks and Jones), Tuesday 7 March 2023 Sheffield City Hall (Brigstocke, Evans, Hawks and Jones), Wednesday 8 March 2023 Victoria Theatre, Halifax (Bremner, Evans, Jones and, Thursday 9 March 2023 Huddersfield Town Hall (Bremner, Evans, Jones and Parris), Friday 10 March 2023 Scarborough Spa (Bremner, Brigstocke, Evans and Jones), Sunday 12 March 2023 Edinburgh Playhouse (Bremner, Evans, Hawks and, Monday 13 March 2023 King's Theatre, Glasgow (Bremner, Brigstocke, Evans and MacAulay), Tuesday 14 March 2023 Perth Concert Hall (Bremner, Brigstocke, Evans and MacAulay), Wednesday 15 March 2023 Caird Hall, Dundee (Bremner, Brigstocke, Evans and MacAulay), Saturday 18 March 2023 The Hexagon, Reading (Bremner, Evans, Hawks and Jones), Sunday 19 March 2023 St David's Hall, Cardiff (Bremner, Brigstocke, Evans and Jones). I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue: Volume 14 [Audio] von BBC It remains the most thrillingly anarchic panel show in any media you care to name' Simon Mayo, Mail on S. I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue demonstrates that the British are unique. [49], In 2008, I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue: The Official Stage Tour embarked on another best of tour, with the intention of visiting many parts of the UK that were missed in the autumn 2007 dates.[50]. She's going to meet him at the monkey house, where he's often found swinging about with his charges. ", "Samantha was telling us before the show she's been visiting a nice gentleman racehorse owner in his stables recently. Episode 524 of 540. COLIN SELL plays SAMANTHA'S TUNE ISIHAC i'm sorry i haven't a clue Although there are twelve Clue shows broadcast per year these are the result of just six recording sessions, with two programmes being recorded back-to-back. I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue What's Wrong With Samantha "Dear Mrs Lawley, Here's an idea: How about a celebrity version of 'Desert Island Disks'? It once made a blind man deaf. Producer Jon Naismith recalled "when we [Naismith and Iain Pattinson] took over the show we used to get quite a few letters accusing us of sexist references to Samantha"[39] (the character was named after the page 3 topless model Samantha Fox). Opportunity Knocks said it was the worst novelty drag act they'd ever had on the show. A 2013 episode featured a round of Useless Celebrities, a parody of Pointless Celebrities, and featured Richard Osman as the co-presenter (this was broadcast three years before Osman appeared on the panel). Incidentally, we've just heard some great news - I'm very pleased to announce that the BBC have arranged a special collection of Colin's entire work they've bagged it up, & the council are sending some men round for it on Tuesday. [citation needed], The pilot episode (at that time titled I'm Sorry, They're At It Again) opened with Graeme Garden and Jo Kendall singing the words of "Three Blind Mice" to the tune of "Ol' Man River" followed by Bill Oddie and Tim Brooke-Taylor performing the lyrics of "Sing a Song of Sixpence" to the melody of "These Foolish Things". The first new shows would be hosted by rotating guest presenters (similarly to the format of Have I Got News for You) before a permanent replacement host was decided. The format of the touring show is a 'Greatest Hits' presentation, sourcing the very finest material from Clue's enormous archives (ably retrieved by Samantha and her two kindly archivist friends). Recorded in 2008 at The Lowry in Salford. - YouTube 0:00 / 3:09 I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue (ISIHAC) Live! (Likewise, occasionally on Just a Minute, a panellist will make a challenge of "Mornington Crescent".)